I seem to wake up most days with a head ache. I think it's the chocolate.
I feel like my insides have somehow become filthy. I think it's it's the smoking and the lack of praying.
It feels like when I see a really dirty duster. It's so dirty and gray, you think that that might just be it's real colour. Then you wash it. And something close to snowy white comes out from underneath. It's really something quite beautiful.
I feel like that dirty duster. And I think I may need some help in washing out the filth.
I've been considering an idea on and off for sometime now. I think I will tell my sister about the smoking. I think she might be able to help me quit once and for all.
I think I might be close to feeling something in prayer, or about prayer, which I suppose is a start. They say it's a cyclical process. Form the habit, then the feeling comes, which perpetuates the habit.
I feel slightly lost, and slightly like I've been unfocused and fuzzy. I think if I can work on things one at a time, that feeling of being stuck or lost or unclear, may go away. At least I hope so.
